NEW YORK, I LOVE YOU... BUT I DON'T LOVE THIS MOVIE

A collection of short stories as told on celluloid, directed by different directors, each with their own small cast of actors and screaming with talented ones at that, this movie just didn't do it for me. There were too many moments, and not enough dots to connect the picture. Perhaps that was the point, how our lives are made up of these moments and that's just it. However, too many of these vignettes were too brief and hard to explain and it made it frustrating to watch. Unlike Paris je t'aime, the biggest character I missed was New York. I felt like there were just fleeting glimpses of the scenery rather than a true show of affection for the city. Very slow paced, even if dotted with one or two well written encounters. Excellent acting, waste of talent.
No bite: I'm sorry new York, N'pas je t'aime.

FAME: THE SOULESS REMAKE

I'm not "gonna live forever" if this is the updated version of the 1980's classic. Add some bubblegum, pop and a heavy beat and we find a film based on what should have been left alone. It was good to see the faculty, Broadway versed in real life, and interesting to see the younger talent; mind you the talent comment is not a rave review of their acting abilities. There were some seemingly authentic moments and good performances, but that does not make a movie earn the name Fame anywhere in it's title.
No bite: Rent the original, it's timeless.

PRECIOUS: BASED ON THE NOVEL PUSH BY SAPPHIRE

"My name is Clareece "Precious" Jones. I wish I had a light-skinned boyfriend with real nice hair. And I wanna be on the cover of a magazine. But first I wanna be in one of them BET videos. Momma said I can't dance. Plus, she said who wants to see my big ass dancing, anyhow? "

There is so little I can say about this movie but not because it was bad or poorly acted. On the contrary, it was such a strong and powerful movie, so well acted you forget that it is indeed acting. This is the story of a young woman who has everything in the world going against her and yet she still finds a way to not only keep going, but to persevere. Gabourey Sidibe stars as our young heroine and her lack of acting ability gives a realistic portrayal of her character. She is obese, black and pregnant, not a cute Juno girl. This is not a cute movie.

BAD LIEUTENANT, BAD MOVIE

Unlike Ferrara's 1992 "Bad Lieutenant", this was not meant as a remake, but it follows the same premise with a lighter approach; bad cop, yet with a sense of humor. What it turns out to be is a VERY long film that seems more David Lynchian than anything else. Nic Cage is the bad cop who albeit a small drug problem and questionable ethics, seems to be a pretty smart officer. So why he has to play dirty confused me. Eva Mendes makes a good whore and Val Kilmer doesn't have enough screen time and what he did have was pablum. It was a mildly engaging film, but needed so much editing and could have been faster and harder hitting that by the end, I just didn't care anymore.
Slight bite: I liked watching a wicked Nic Cage, but the rest was not enough.

ACROSS THE HALL IS NOT ENOUGH DISTANCE
I'll admit to watching this as it was one of Brittany Murphy's last film role. It sells itself as a thriller, but it's mainly a slow moving, sleepy attempt at a film noir. The pace is akin to walking through pudding and the acting just as lax. The "surprise" ending isn't and everything else is just as predictable.
Not even a nibble: Hard to stay awake through and meaningless.

PARANORMAL ACTIVITY HAD ME UNTIL GOODBYE
Along the lines of the Blair Witch Project, we meet a lovely young couple, Katie (Katie Featherstone) and Micah (Micah Sloat) who live in a lovely home with a lovely life until really weird stuff starts happening to them, or rather, her. Micah is the overexcited boyfriend that wants to catch it all on tape for You-Tube while Katie just wants to find some peace of mind. The slow pace is forgivable, but the ending offers less than to be desired. It is Katie that gives the picture any sort of resemblance to a documentary and she does so very well. I prefer scary movies that aren't all blood and guts and this one was creepy enough to pass muster.
Bite: More thriller than horror with a misplaced ending, otherwise compelling.