THE INFORMERS

THE INFORMERS: PREDECESSOR TO GOSSIP GIRL

Remember in the '80's when we all ran around having bisexual relations, snorting coke, waking up and taking that first hit off the bong then chain smoking and laying around all day? Welcome to the Informers. Brett Easton Ellis is one of the most prolific writers from that generation. However, like all great writers, he wrote about what he knew, and his view of youth is not like most of ours. His characters are rich and bored and numbing themselves anyway possible. Read the book. Ellis wrote Less Than Zero which also became a movie, better known for a terrifyingly real portrayal of a young man out of control, Robert Downey Jr. Same set up, bored rich kids with every opportunity on a platter yet choosing from the vending machine instead. Ellis also was responsible for American Psycho staring Christian Bale.

MY BEST FRIEND'S GIRL

MY BEST FRIEND'S GIRL; CRUDE, RUDE AND EVEN KIND OF ENJOYABLE

This is so not the film I thought I would like. It's an unconventional story; a more passive man finds his grip lossening on his girlfriend so there is a last ditch attempt and that involves Tank (Dane Cook). Tank is certainly physically appealing, but to be nice, he lacks manners. That is putting it very easy. He resorts to any and all well planned and perfected gross and disgusting maneuvers which usually result in the targeted girlfriend running back into the arms of what now appears the right guy. But there is always an exception. Enter Alexis (Kate Hudson). She is Tank's match and the antics lead the movie in a total opposite direction. I never expected a romance in this movie, but it heads that way and it isn't for me to spoil the ending. Generally speaking I like Dane Cook; generally. Until now, I considered him more of a comedian than an actor. This movie changed my mind. He's no George Clooney or Clive Owen, more like Owen Wilson. All aside, he did a pretty decent job. Hudson, she's done better, was still was a delight to watch.
Bite: Not a great film, but certainly entertaining.

DANCE FLICK: Quick Bite

DANCE FLICK, WELL, IT WAS A DVD...

The smallest review I've written. In one word; no.

I love the Wayan's brothers (they could fill a small town) but this was a lame movie. I also love spoof movies, but the references were either way outdated or thrown together too quickly. Every stereotype was played and not played well. Don't waste your time.

WENDY AND LUCY

WENDY AND LUCY: SEE WENDY, SEE LUCY, SEE THEM WALK... (YAWN)
I love Michelle Williams. I love dogs. But I didn't love wasting my time; watching them walking, living homeless, shoplifting, walking some more. It may be this genius indie film, but I didn't like it. I broke my rule of never watching films with dogs in it (case in paint: Marley and Me) and this film proved just as disappointing. She seemed to be going somewhere, but this film went nowhere for me. If that wasn't enough, the ending sucked enough to destroy any good parts in this film.
No Bite: I expected more.

FRAGMENTS AKA: WINGED CREATURES

FRAGMENTS MAKE SUM OF WHOLE COMPELLING

Although not a thriller, I felt myself practically holding my breath, anxiously waiting for the next layer to peel off and reveal yet another piece of the puzzle. This movie centers on a group of strangers and their recollections and attempts to cope with a seemingly random shooting at the local diner. The cast is vast and wide and the film compelling and meaningful, mainly: the waitress, a single mother in a tight situation, (Kate Beckinsale), a ordinary man seated at the counter (Forest Whitaker), a doctor just in for some coffee (Guy Pearce), a young girl (Dakota Fanning) who watches as her father is killed then turns to God for all the answers, and her friend (Josh Hutcherson) who stops speaking after the incident.

Additionally, the families related to those involved are also given a closer look: the mother (Jeanne Tripplehorn), the daughter (Jennifer Hudson) the wife (Embeth Davidtz). However the star lit cast, it was the story and the memories and flashbacks that the characters endured and relived over and over that provided the structure. Situations like this happen so regularly that we've become tolerant but when it happens to you, and it could, this may be what it looks like. There is no hero. There is nothing but random events that when put together, make a highly provocative film.

Without a doubt, Forrest Whitaker is one of the brighter spots in this film. His acting looks effortless and when the final shocker comes you really wouldn't have seen it coming. The dimmest star is Dakota Fanning who was rumored to be difficult to work with on the set. Her performance seemed phoned in. "Wait till I get through my awkward years, then I'll be a good actress." She acted. Too much. Aside from that, it didn't handicap the movie one bit. It was real and believable and serves as a reminder how fragile life is and how fragile everyone else's life is too.
Bite: A very interesting and entertaining film.

SUNSHINE CLEANING

SUNSHINE CLEANING IS SPOTLESS
Rose Lorkowski (Amy Adams) wants a better life for her son and herself. After her mother died when sh was young, she has spent her life taking care of everyone but herself. Full of high hopes and positive affirmations, she works as a housekeeper until she can earn her real estate license; her ticket out. She passes the time in a "relationship" with her high school boyfriend, now married to someone else. She struggles to care for her handful of a son, her get-rich-quick scheming father, Joe (Alan Arkin) and her emotionally bruised sister Norah (Emily Blunt). She tries to find solace in the arms of her married ex-high school boyfriend, Mac, but she comes up alone and broken. An opportunity comes knocking; working as a crime scene clean-up worker to which she dives into full force, dragging her sister behind her. Rose exudes confidence and starts to glow with the pride of doing meaningful work and feeling like she is making a difference. Her sister reluctantly joins her as she seems allergic to working in general.
She doesn't like it, but tries her best, perhaps to please her sister and even finding her own self worth. She has spent a lifetime morning the loss of her mother without being sure exactly how to do just that. She is a pathetic mess trying to find some peace of mind.

THE INTERNATIONAL

THE INTERNATIONAL: ZERO TO SIXTY IN THIRTY FIVE MINUTES
Frankly, the whole first half of this movie both bored and confused me. Even though our main character, Interpol Agent Louis Salinger (Clive Owen) is determined to "get the bad guy" he isn't likable. I understand he didn't need to be and references are made about his past that indicate he was coming off some personal demons, just not enough, however, to make me care; loosely followed by Manhattan Assistant District Attorney Eleanor Whitman (Naomi Watts). Perhaps this is the way that their real counterparts act, but this is a movie and I need to feel some kind of connection to the people who are trying to save the day. Ironically enough, the director purposefully made his "bad guys" not bad, but humans who are just trying to take care of their own families and live their own lives. That was a nice touch.

SAW V: Quick Bite

SAW V: NOT MY PROUDEST MOMENT

By now, you should be able to tell my tastes include horror films, but only to a certain extent. When I watched the first in the Saw series, it was with a girfriend, eyes closed most of the time. What interested me is that the killings aren't random, don't take place on a deserted summer campground or after the car runs out of gas on a back road in rural America. Jigsaw (Tobin Bell) is an interesting character and a facinating actor. Although he sets up the "game", he stresses to his undercover partner in a series of flashbacks, that they had a choice and are given options that don't always lead to death. While heralded as the weakest in the series, I liked this one because the gore factor is low (but still gory and yes, I closed my eyes a lot) but the reasoning behind Jigsaw's actions are revealed and he comes off as sympathetic, wanting to make the world a better place; wanting to make people grow and learn from their mistakes. Despite the ick-factor and because of the desire to watch Bell's skill, I made it to the end (which some did not). Still not my favorite genre, but an interesting concept.

Nibble: I liked the psychological and forensic attention, but not the blood and gore.

THE SOLOIST

THE SOLOIST: A PERFECT DUET


Being a psychology major in college, I've gained a discerning eye with regard to films about the mentally ill. My complaints usually stem from the usual stereotypical behavior assigned to each condition. This film, however, did an exceptional job of showing the reality of a terrible majority of those who suffer mental illness and homelessness. It's not perfect and to me, ended up being more about homelessness than mental illness. Over time, many people who endure mental illness have also been blessed with genius; painting, writing, playing music. That's where this movie starts. Steve Lopez (Robert Downey Jr.) is a reporter in Los Angeles who, while searching for story ideas, comes across an interesting character, Nathaniel Ayers (Jamie Foxx) who can make a two-strung violin sound like angels from heaven.

LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT

LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT GIVES NEW MEANING TO HORROR FILM; WARNING, THIS REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS

This was, by far, the most horrifying horror film I've seen in a while. It's not because it was that good. It's due to its over the top, graphic and painful violence. Characters like Jason or Freddy are surreal. They kill at random and usually in an over the top, not so believable (get out of the house!) way. Haunted house flicks are suspenseful and may have bloodshed, but it's from unearthly beings, which again, makes it less believable. Last House, however, is so realistic and "it could happen to anyone-ish" that it is unbearable to even hear some scenes, let alone watch them. The story is a nice doctor and his family go to their summer house. The young girl, as usual, wants to visit her friend and heads into town. One thing leads to another and soon the young girl is beaten, brutally raped, shot and then left for dead by a rag-tag bunch of psychopaths. As the rain hits, the psychopaths end up at the girls house, unwittingly asking her parents for shelter from the rain. It is tense and even more suspenseful than a grade B horror flick.

QUID PRO QUO: Quick Bite

QUID PRO QUO: NOT AN EVEN TRADE

Was more like 'Quid Pro NO' as far as I'm concerned. David Cronenberg had a controversial film in 1996 called Crash (no, not that one) where it was a mysterious mixture of damaged people and sex. From the jacket, this was supposed to be the same type of film and it missed the mark. Issac Knott (Nick Stahl) is a radio reporter who gets a leed for a story about people faking being confined to their wheelchairs. The twist is that he is paralyzed from a car accident when he was young. So he does his detective work, meets a mysterious woman, Fiona, (Vera Farmiga)and then the plot tanks from there. By the time the movie should have climaxed, it looses it's hard on and the revelation falls on an empty movie theater (if it even made it that far). Boring, boring, boring and SO not sexy.

Bite Me: Go rent the original Crash and watch a truly twisted and sexy film.

17 AGAIN: Quick Bite

17 AGAIN: CAN'T TELL YOU WHY...

Think of this as the guy's answer to Freaky Friday. A man (Chandler, I mean Matthew Perry) whose life is not turning out the way he hoped mysteriously morphs back into his 17 year old body (Zac Efron). Who would want to be 17 again is a far more mysterious thought to me. It doesn't take much effort to see where the jokes fall, and the physical humor is a stretch. Chandler, I mean Mike's friend, Ned, (Thomas Lennon) who pretends to be his father is amusingly worth watching. I lived to see it to the end of the movie, but I still wouldn't recommend it to anyone over 17.

Mini Bite: Not a terrible movie, but not clever, or unpredictable either.

PUSH: Quick Bite

PUSH: JUST LIKE HEROES FROM TV.... SERIOUSLY

That's pretty much the film in a nutshell except we see Dakota Fanning working on keeping her career alive now that she's not a cute little kid. Basically a group of people (like in Heroes) are trying to track down young pretty people with "abilities" (just like Heroes) and use their powers for evil not good. It takes place in Hong Kong, so that's different, otherwise it's a cheap knockoff.
No Bite: Instead, rent the first season of Heroes and catch up before the new one starts.

I LOVE YOU MAN: Quick Bite

I LOVE YOU MAN... I LOVE YOU A WHOLE LOT

Just when I've given up on love, in walks a movie with a whole different twist. Peter Klaven (Paul Rudd) and Zooey (Rashida Jones) are about to get married. Problem is, once all the wedding plans are in motion, it becomes painfully obvious that Peter doesn't have any guy friends. So this is a love story about a man, a woman and another man; but not in the way that you think. This is a fresh and hilarious movie, perfectly cast and acted, that was so funny I thought I might pee my pants. Sydney (Jason Segel) is a perfect answer for Peter's plight. His actions and the twists and turns keep you guessing and also points out how cynical we can be. Rush fans need apply.
BIG BITE: Be sure to watch the extras. The gag reel alone will make you chuckle.

THE UNBORN: Very Quick Bite

THE UNBORN SHOULD HAVE STAYED THAT WAY

Bad acting, cheap screams, convoluted plot, dud of an ending. The only thing that kept me watching, aside of feelings of duty, was the Rabbi who breathed fresh air into the movie and performed an entertaining exorcism.

Bite Me: Can I have my rental fee back???