A SINGLE MAN: STYLISHLY BORING

The seconds literally crept by through each frame of this Tom Ford film. It stylishly introduces us to George Falconer (Colin Firth) who is a professor whose partner was recently killed leaving a hug void in his life. Funny enough, set during a time when partner was used more in the business sense between two men, it's not a "gay" film. It just so happens that Falconer is gay and the person he loved was a man. The point is that he loved, so deeply that he doesn't want to go on, so he sets about living his last day on earth before he joins his lover in the hereafter; cue the things in life that one can't prepare for, such as other's actions and moments of clarity. Firth exudes the performance of a lifetime. Unfortunately, the script is so centered on the smallness of his actions it leads to a very subtle change and a more subtle film. A film, in fact, so subtle, that I was indeed bored. Julianne Moore did nothing but devote a few minutes as a lonely fag hag, beautiful as she was. A good looking period piece, just not un-subtle enough to keep watching for the small stuff; as in this film, you should sweat the small stuff.

CHLOE: NOT QUITE THE GIRL NEXT DOOR

...and not quite your average thriller either. Chloe is an "erotic thriller" (which sounds like something you'd only find in the 18 an up section of the video store) centered around a paranoid wife, Catherine, (Julianne Moore) who thinks her husband is having an affair. So, she does what any other suspicious wife would do and hires a prostitute, Amanda Seyfried as Chole, to temp her husband into infidelity. Now here's the hook; Chloe isn't the most stable woman in the world. She has issues. So of course everything spins out of control and Catherine is left holding the bag. This film is based on a french film, Nathalie, and is the first film that Atom Egoyan didn't pen. While the film has it's sensual drapery that is Egoyan's, it it obviously not his work. At it's base, the film tries to emphasize the need to connect with each other and the fine line between what is real and what is imagined. While it began as an interesting concept, I felt like the film just slightly missed the mark. The performances were solid, most notably Liam Neeson whose wife died during filming. It wasn't a terrible movie, just hard to swallow (so to speak) regarding the actions the characters took. My favorite films push the envelope of believability however this one pushed too far.

THE ROAD: NOT A PRETTY STROLL

Written by the man who brought us No Country For Old Men, this movie is not for the weak. It is one of the best end of days movies I have seen, about a father (Viggo Mortensen) and his son (Kodi Smit-McPhee) not named, just credited as man and boy. They are survivors making their way south in hopes of finding others who have survived. They do find people. Unfortunately with the food supply greatly diminished a lot of the people they find view them as dinner, not survivors. It is a pretty dark film. However, there is light. The light comes from the bond between father and son; the love a father has for his son and the lengths he will go to keep him alive and safe. The special effects are powerful. Charlize Theron is the mother who after living in survival mode for too long, looses it and throws in the towel. Robert Duvall, almost unrecognisable, has a small part and Guy Pearce has an even smaller one, but both are top notch. The boy is amazing. How a child can pretend these things are happening and give such a powerful performance is a mystery. There is a scene where the man is washing the boys head in a creek and it's cold. In reality, the boy began crying from the pain yet still had the presence of mind to use it as an actor. Amazing. Although dark, it was a very well done film and one worth watching.

THE BOUNTY HUNTER: NOT WORTH A CLEVER TITLE

I have seen many bad movies, but s a rule I stick it out to the end just to be fair. This was not the case with this "film". Within the first 15 minutes, Gerard Butler was acting like such a doofus and Jennifer Aniston's whining and complaining was so overwhelmingly attacking my senses that it had to be turned off. It fit neither the black comedy that was coming off as just plain mean nor did it fit the lighthearted romantic comedy due to the lack of spark between the two and the lack of comedy. Do NOT waste the WHOLE DOLLAR you can rent this for with Redbox; and trust me, it would be a waste.

DEFENDOR: MY FAVORITE SUPER HERO

Constable Mike: Captain, this guy is pretty funny.

He says he wants to call a truce.
Captain Fairbanks: A vigilante?
Constable Mike: No. No, he's a superhero. He calls him Defendor. And that's with an O-R, Captain. It's not an E-R. Defendor.

And he flips out if you get that wrong. It's very bizarre.

What a most unpredictable and thoroughly enjoyable movie this turned out to be! Woody Harrelson is one of the most underestimated actors of our time. At the base, this is a story about people and how they can have redeeming qualities regardless of how they might seem at first glance. It is almost an homage to super hero movies, full of all their cliches, but then it takes a turn to the dramatic and by the end, turns out to be a sincere and touching movie. We meet DefenDOR wearing all black with a black makeup eye mask and a helmet complete with duct taped on flashlights (for better night vision). A crude "D" marks his chest, also made from duct tape. He has his secret weapons; marbles, hornets in a jar, sling shot and lime juice and surprisingly, they work pretty well. While in the streets defending people from evil he "rescues" a crack whore hooker with a heart of gold (Kat Dennings) and battles a rogue undercover policeman (my favorite Elias Koteas). It's fun to watch how mild mannered Arthur Poppington (Harrelson) turns into Defendor, complete with his Batman voice and clever superhero one liners. "Look out, termites. It's squishing time." In time we see that he is a bit mentally challenged while he tells of his adventures to Sandra Oh, a court appointed psychiatrist. The layers get peeled back and we discover the events that led to this point and it gets a bit more dramatic than funny, however it is never mired down in the seriousness. Harrelson is one of the best actors of this generation and for such an odd and off-beat film, he classes it up all the way. It could have been a terrible film, but with his very touching performance, it makes for one that should not be missed. Be sure to watch the outtakes and featurettes.

ALICE IN WONDERLAND... WHAT A WONDER INDEED

Alice Kingsley: This is impossible.

The Mad Hatter: Only if you believe it is.

This is not your father's Alice in Wonderland.  Tim Burton haters do not need to read any further. I can't understand why critics slammed this film so hard knowing what a twist Burton provides to everything he does. I loved this film. It was like watching a totally new story, only slightly resembling the previous movies that have been made. Burton brought on his A game, creating a bizarro world full of good and evil, so visually amazing and enjoyable. Alice (Mia Wasikowska) is a young woman now, not a girl, and she is rebelling against the norm of the day, getting married to a man she hardly knows and doesn't love. Of course she falls through the rabbit hole and is taken to a far different world, strange yet compelling. Like in a dream, elements of Alice's real life are brought in to Wonderland, only under much more bizarre participants. In this world, she is made to fight her demons. Literally. Of course the biggest stir was Johnny Depp playing the Mad Hatter. I hated the way he looked, but loved him in character, especially his lapse into a deep Scottish brogue.  Wasikowska was adorable and was able to show Alice's transformation. She did a great job with a most gratifying battle scene toward the end. The CGI effects in this are incredible. Almost everything was shot on a green screen and to think that actors have to pretend in the first place, nonetheless pretend with nothing around to put them in character, I'd say they did a spectacular job. This is not a movie for everyone. In a world where the Bounty Hunter is a number one rental, I question the majority's taste. I may be the only one, but I though this film was lovely and enchanting. Be sure to watch the bonus features to see how they created Wonderland and the odd looking assorted inhabitants. Thanks Tim!

CRAZY HEART: CRAZY FOR JEFF BRIDGES

There's a reason Jeff Bridges won Oscar's best actor in this film. A true, yet washed up musician, banished to playing bowling alleys, Bad Blake (Bridges) is rolling along with wherever the wind, or a paying gig, takes him with the best of his career seemingly behind him. A lifetime tailor made for writing country music, he has resigned himself to life with the bottle and who ever is willing to follow him to bed at night. Then he meets Jean (a luminous Maggie Gyllenhaal) a reporter for the local paper who can't conceal a crush, but can smell out a doomed relationship miles away. After dancing around a bit, they hook up together, an unlikely pair and Bad earnestly tries to make something work out where it hasn't before. His smooth talking and southern drawl charms his way into her heart, but his hard drinking gets in the way and causes many serious problems. Bridges is so good at being Bad that you can smell him; the cheap cigarettes and booze and sweat. He's very much human and greatly flawed. There is no CGI that can help the scene of him running to throw up while wearing his baggy white briefs. His belly is a gut and it just isn't pretty. He knows defeat and even when close to giving up still comes up for air. His scenes with Jean's son are lovely and sad all at the same time. I'm not a big country fan, but the music in the score by T-Bone Burnett and the duets sung with Colin Farrell are touching. Both Bridges and Farrell sung on their own. There's a pull of old country versus new country and I think Farrell did a good job portraying his new country character. It's hard to believe this was filmed in only 24 days. I really liked this movie what with such a stellar cast and exceptional lead. Bridges certainly earned the Oscar on this one.

THE BURNING PLAIN: NOT AS HOT AS IT SEEMS

A beautifully shot film, this follows the stories of a mother finding love in another's arms, Gina (Kim Basinger) and a young woman Sylvia (Charlize Theron) who tends to find love in who ever's arms are nearest. Gina has a home in New Mexico with her often away husband and children. Sylvia lives in Oregon, a seemingly successful business woman. The story weaves back and forth between the two women as well as Gina's daughter and impending love interest. Admittedly, it is hard to watch and wait to see how the two, or if the two lives intertwine. They do. When they do, it's shocking. The dialogue was pretty nonexistent, but the complex way the story was spun was amazing. Basinger shows again how good she is at playing fragile, vulnerable women just as Theron shows how good she is at portraying intense and complex women. The DVD extras explains a bit about the elements of the movie in relation to the elements (water, fire, earth, wind) and adds valuable insight. It wasn't an extraordinary film, but one well done and worth seeing.

REMEMBER ME: JUST TRY TO FORGET THIS FILM

Gandhi said that whatever you do in life will be insignificant. But it's very important that you do it. I tend to agree with the first part.

This is not a vampire movie; far from it. This movie breathes life and reality into an actor who has been forever pigeonholed into the body of a hundred year old vampire with translucent skin. This movie is a most pleasant surprise. We meet Tyler (Robert Pattinson) who is at first glance a bum. He looks a bit rough around the edges and tends to chain smoke. However, aside from his brooding exterior (most James Dean like) we find a charming, smart and likable young man. He is a great defender of what is right, even if that means causing him trouble with his family, friends and the law. He meets an equally troubled young woman, Alyssa or Ally, (Emilie de Ravin) who has a disturbing past and a rough present. The two collide and sparks fly and a romance begins which is healing for each of them. They take turns at dealing with their family problems and find solace in each other's arms. As issues come to light and we find more about them, we also find more about the events that conspire to reach climax at the end of the story, which is actually a beginning. It is an absorbing and heartfelt film. Surrounded by a fabulous supporting cast, Pattinson absolutely shines and for once, it has nothing to do with his skin.

YOUTH IN REVOLT: OVERALL REVOLTING

Poor Michael Cera. How many more years must he endure before completing puberty?! He plays Nick Twisp a nerd and geek whose name is just as awkward as he is. He falls in "love" with the girl far out of his league, Sheenie (Portia Doubleday) but he actually somewhat impresses her and in order to keep her interest he comes up with an alternate ego, rather an "id", Francois who is bad enough to do the things Nick wouldn't dare. Aside from knowing that Cera really has the market on adolescent gawkiness, the movie had some high points in dialogue, but otherwise got lost on the trip to the ice cream store. The movie is full of teen angst as well as some high power names, but that doesn't help it from falling apart. I give it marks for trying; unfortunately they are barely passing.

INVICTUS: UNCONQUERABLE MOVIE

I thank whatever gods may be / For my unconquerable soul. /

I am the master of my fate / I am the captain of my soul.

Invictus is Latin for unbeaten and it has more meaning than just in a game of rugby. We find Nelson Mandela (an electric and gracious Morgan Freeman) in his first term as the South African President, trying to bring his country, torn apart by apartheid, together. The vessel for his intention turns out to be the country's rugby team with his eyes, and soon everyone else's, set on winning the Rugby World Cup with the help of team captain François Pienaar (a silently strong yet understated Matt Damon). Short of nothing else, this film is magic. It is engaging and compelling because it is the story of men, not Gods. Mandela's assertive determination is inspiring and so clever. No other actor could have channeled Mandela like Morgan Freeman did. He was the first actor cast and the only one Mandela had in mind. Matt Damon was very subtle and respectfully quiet in his role without losing any of his character's strength. The scene where he visits the prison cell where Mandela was imprisoned was the actual cell and he gave the scene the reverence and respect it called for. The score was lovely and each and every supporting actor did a seamless job. The relationship between Mandela's bodyguards was enjoyable. Additionally, the "flyover" scene was breathtaking. I could not give higher praise for this film and Clint Eastwood at his directorial best.

HAPPY TEARS: SAD MOVIE

I really wanted to like this movie. Demi Moore (Laura) and Parker Posey (Jayne) are both competent and potentially wonderful actresses when given the right roles. However, the roles weren't so bad as the script on the whole. An ailing father and two adult sisters, both very different, return to care for them the best they can. It turned out to be a maudlin, crazy ride of a film; fantasy sequences that add more confusion than anything. The high point for me was watching the few minutes of Ellen Barkin as a hot mess of a crack whore. Overall, I found this movie depressing without any good payoff at the end, despite all its efforts.

FANTASTIC MR. FOX: INDEED IS FANTASTIC

Mrs. Fox: This story's too predictable. Mr. Fox: Predictable? Really? Then, how does it end? Mrs. Fox: In the end, we all die. Unless you change.

Never again will I doubt Wes Anderson. Being a fan of his work, I let this one pass by doubting that he could keep his uniqueness while working with stop action figures. I was wrong. From start to finish this film about a fox (George Clooney) who is looking to improve his lot in life for himself and his family (Meryl Streep, Jason Schwartzman) is totally reminiscent of the Royal Tennenbaums. The dialogue is the glue that holds it all together aside from the cast of loyal alum. Rat (Willem Dafoe) is a scene stealer in a movie where all the scenes are stellar. This is the best cussing movie I've seen in a while.

NINE: NOT ON THE ONE TO TEN SCALE

What happened Rob Marshall? Chicago was so awesome and Nine was so full of stars and looked pretty and it stunk big fat rotten eggs! The story centers around director Guido Contini (Daniel-Day Lewis) who has lost his self and struggles with a new project while looking back at the women in and throughout his life who have touched him, so to speak. There is his mother (a luminous Sofia Loren), his wife (an enchanting Marion Cotillard), his mistress (a bubbly Penelope Cruz) his muse ( the shell of Nicole Kidman) his friend (a not sexy Judi Dench) a writer and admirer (Kate Hudson) and a random crazy whore (??!?!) from his past (a terrible looking Stacey- Fergie- Ferguson). There are others, but these are the ones he reflects upon. Each actress has a musical number, Cotillard, Cruz and Hudson's are the best, but they still came out flat. Lewis was okay, but didn't quite hit the nail on the head. The whole movie is like a bottle of warm soda that's been shaken one too many times. Even the main set looked like the prison backdrop from Chicago. Despite everything right, this movie was a big wrong. It almost felt like they thought by just having such a stellar cast it would carry the rest of the film. It did not. This was a sad disappointment.  

FROM PARIS WITH LOVE: A FINE BROMANCE PACKING HEAT

Richard Stevens: I'm not your driver. I'm your partner.

FBI agent Charlie Wax: Yeah, you're the chess player. I read your file.

Richard Stevens: You play?
FBI agent Charlie Wax: Do I look like I play board games?

From director Luc Besson, we are presented with a sassy, bang bang,  testosterone filled romp through Paris; a love story of a different sort. Meet Richard Stevens (Jonathan Rhys Meyers) who lives and works in Paris as an aid to the US Ambassador. But when he grows up, he wants to be a special agent; a secret special black-ops agent. He has been given mysterious assignments little by little and he follows orders like a good soldier without asking too many questions. Them like Sidney Poitier at a dinner party, agent Charlie Wax (John Travolta) drops by. Wax is everything that Stevens is not and then some.  Right off the bat he is one tough motherfucker. I use that term because that is his favorite word and comes out of his mouth at a high rate of speed. He, in his bald glory, is about as bad ass as they come.